Everyone has probably heard of the term “trophy wife.” I know a lot of guys seek “trophy wives.” Upon pondering this phrase I realized just how objectifying it really is. Women are human beings, not trophies. We’re made up of the same material as men; blood, flesh and bone. Culture teaches that we are less than, objects that need to be held to an unattainable goal of physical perfection.

It’s interesting to note though that the Bible does not say one word about a potential wife being required to be physically perfect. Even the proverbial description of a worthy woman in Proverbs says nothing about the “excellent wife’s” physical appearance except that she is physically strong and wears good quality clothing (doesn’t say “fashionable clothing” but “fine linen”).

One of the final verses of Proverbs 31 states that “charm is deceitful and beauty is vain” If our culture says that physical beauty is the ultimate indicator that you have scored the perfect wife yet the Bible says that beauty is vain, I’m thinking that most men have their standards a little bit out of order.

Physical attraction is a factor to consider in a marriage partner, the Lord meant for it to be that way. But it’s not the main factor and should never be the main factor. There is nothing wrong with beauty, I love to look beautiful, the Lord created beauty, He’s the author of it and it is good.

Beauty in its purest form is right, it’s only when we allow the quest for perfection in each other’s bodies to rule our lives that beauty becomes simply a cheap, plastic, faux gold plated trophy.

So, you may ask, if physical beauty should not be your primary basis for finding a wife what are you supposed to be looking for in woman? Well, the beginning of Proverb thirty-one’s 21 verse description of a worthy woman states “her worth is far above jewels” and since the 21 verses reference things other than physical makeup that would be a good place to start.

I would say that the bottom line though is to look for a woman with a beautiful heart. The body will fade, grow brittle and eventually die; it will decrease in earthly value for lack of a better term. But the heart set upon the Lord will continue to grow, remain soft and bring forth fruit for eternity.

I’ve set two things before you therefore there is a choice if you have the courage to make it. Remember that marriage is a covenant, not a lease. Choose wisely.

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